Corrupt a Wish

Granted, but someone steals it.

I wish I had my headphones

Granted, but now you lack the device you were going to use them with.

I wish the encounter rate for a shiny was higher.

Granted, but it's so high, that regular Pokemon now become the 'shiny'.

I wish my internet was faster

Granted, but then it's so fast nobody on earth can use it.

I wish my back stopped hurting.

Granted, but now your front hurts.

I wish I could level up in AQW faster.

Granted, but then you overflow and start off back at level one.

I wish Mios weren't so expensive.

(Mio's? Mioi? Mioeses? The plural looks weird...)

Granted, but the quality goes down with the price.

Okay so as the assistant director for the school's play that happens tonight I wish all the actors KNEW THEIR FRACKING LINES.

Granted but only because their minds have been taken over by the huge parasites sticking out of their backs thus ruining the illusion to the audience that they knew their lines.

I wish this itch would torment somebody else.

Granted, but they wish it right back to you.

I wish people would be quiet.

Granted but now nobody ever speaks.

I wish I had a duelshock3 controller.

Granted, but its broken

I wish allergies didn't exist

Granted, but now everybody is lactosintolerant.

I wish this shiny spritomb would hatch finely.

Granted, but they then have a shint spiritomb event.

I wish i didnt have to work

Granted, but now you have no money.

I wish these braces were going to be taken off.

Granted, but your teeth go completely crooked in every way.

I wish I were close to a power outlet.

Granted, but it shocks you.
I wish it was next friday

Granted, but you send the time from here to there in a coma.

I wish school would stop being evil.

Granted, but in its lack of evilness it neglects to teach you anything and you go out into the world clueless and afraid.

As though we aren't going out that way anyways :/

I wish I were prepared for life.

Granted but now you're in bubble wrap.

(I feel your pain, I feel it so much...)

I wish for something happy! I had a panic attack today...

Granted, you have a cute little kitten, that promptly bites your nose.

I wish I had more ambition.

Granted, but your ambition is to become a professional antagonist.

I wish my anime club wasn't full of dirtbags.

Granted, it's now full of scumbags.

I wish my school knew what air conditioning was tonight

Granted, but then the place turns into an ice rink.

I wish my school wouldn't have it on ice rink mode all the time.

Granted, now its a tad off 106.

I wish I could find more music to listen too.

It's silent hill music so it's really just white noise.

I wish my glasses would stop cutting into my ear.