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 I'm Writing A Book, Guys

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Common Nonsense
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PostSubject: I'm Writing A Book, Guys   Sun Jul 11, 2010 9:23 pm

Sorta.

I have ideas floating around and I've tried to map them out, but I haven't made too much progress. This is kind of what one of the chapters, or part of one, might look like.

I don't really think the name Aden will stick, but I needed a name, because writing "______" takes longer and doesn't read as well.

-----

The figure stopped in the alley, looking down at the man he had killed. Satisfied that the man was indeed dead, he leaned against the brick wall and brought the killing blade, a six-inch dagger, up to eye level. A sound of disgust came from his throat as he eyed the blood that coated the fine steel and the decorated hilt. He leaned on the wall and casually pulled a rag from a pouch at his hip, a bottle full of clear liquid from the same one, and pulled the cork from the bottle with his teeth. Aden watched as the man covered the bottle with the cloth, turned it over to allow the liquid to soak the fabric, and began using the now damp cloth to calmly clean his blade as though he weren’t standing next to the corpse he had created.

Aden felt ill, but at the same time, he was fascinated. The kind of person that could be unaffected by death, fight and kill and still walk away unscathed—that was the kind of person he wished he could be. Someone who was feared and fearless.

Aden hesitated behind the corner he peered around, debating whether he should approach the man. The assassin didn’t seem like the type to take apprentices, though the act wasn’t unheard of.

“Kid, get out of here,” said the man, making Aden jump. Aden didn’t yet move, wondering if there could be someone else the man was referring to.

It was silent for a moment, which seemed to stretch into an hour for him, until the man spoke again. “Kid, I said get the hell out. You don’t need to be hanging around here and it would do you good to leave before I have to throw you out myself.”

Aden thought about it, unsure of whether he should openly antagonize the one he had just witnessed kill another man. How might he react?

Aden had little time to contemplate this. He swore he only blinked before the man was in front of him, towering over him. The blade that was just being cleaned gleamed silver in the faint light. He held it loosely by the end of the hilt, dangling it teasingly.

“Hard of hearing?” he asked. From here, Aden could see why the voice was so muffled; the man wore a bit of black cloth across the lower half of his face, rested just under his nose and pulled back behind his neck.

“N-no,” Aden replied, feeling foolish as he stuttered. He took a step backward, away from the taunting blade.

“Then why haven’t you gone?”

“I-I . . .” Aden swallowed hard, trying to find his voice. “You’re not going to kill me?”

“Why? Do you want to die? I’m sure you can find a way to do that on your own, can’t you? I’d rather not kill a kid.”

“Even though I saw you . . .”

“Even though you saw me kill him?” He laughed lowly and snapped the dagger up into his hand. There was a flicker of movement, and the blade was sheathed at his hip. “The only ones who have to kill witnesses are the ones who are afraid of being caught, and that is something I don’t intend to be.” He smirked (or so thought Aden, who had to guess at the outline of the lips under the cloth) and added, “However, I can’t say the same for those who meddle too much.”

Aden swallowed again, thinking to turn around and run, but his feet were rooted firmly to the spot.

“You’re a rather stupid kid,” remarked the killer.

Not offended, having heard the insult too many times in his life to count, Aden straightened. “I want to be your apprentice,” he announced.

He was answered with a stare.

“No,” said the man flatly. He pressed his hand up against the wall, and Aden watched as the fingertips gripped the edge of a brick exposed by the crumbling of the brick above it. “Ask someone who has more time to screw around.”

“But--”

“Kid, I’m not going to repeat myself.” He turned to the wall and jumped, pulling himself up with his grip on the brick while his feet kicked off the wall, launching him upward. He caught the edge of the building’s roof and pulled himself up, disappearing beyond the edge and out of Aden’s view.

Aden watched with dismay as his opportunity slipped off into the night. He knew he had sounded foolish asking. Likely there was a better way of earning an apprenticeship, but if there was, he didn’t know of it, and nor did he know anyone to ask. Perhaps he needed to prove himself somehow, but he didn’t know what would appear impressive.

It likely didn’t matter, though. He didn’t know where to look for the assassin. He didn’t have a face to look for, or even a name.

He tried to think. Most assassins had their names around the city. Likewise, if they took on apprentices, the news wouldn’t be difficult to find. The information often trickled down, first from the richer classes who employed the killers as they informed those who were interested, then into the taverns, from which anyone could retrieve information if they went to the right places.

Well, he didn’t have anything better to do.

He looked to the corpse still laying in the alleyway, the body heat beginning to dissipate. The face looked a little familiar, but he couldn’t place why.

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PostSubject: Re: I'm Writing A Book, Guys   Sat Nov 20, 2010 6:33 am

Wow. I love this plotline. It's awesome! I like the name Aden though. I have a bit of trouble when I name my characters too. I love this. Can't wait to read the rest, if you post it or publish it or whatever.
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PostSubject: Re: I'm Writing A Book, Guys   Sat Nov 20, 2010 11:20 am

Thanks. C: I haven't worked on it in awhile, having a lack of real plotline at the moment, but there might be more. Glad ya like it.

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PostSubject: Re: I'm Writing A Book, Guys   Sun Nov 21, 2010 3:25 pm

Yep. Clear narrative and a couple of characters that you know instantly. A bad-ass assassin with a miss-led kid. Should be interesting.

Only thing I can think of is to throw in more setting. Its an alleyway. There ought to be a smell equivalent of a Train Crash. There's everything that's rotting in the bins near-by and everyone who couldn't find a toilet in time. Maybe mention light, or lack there of. Where it pools in places under street-lamps. Noise is good, any cars? How quiet are they? Maybe a guy watching TV too loud?

Wha-do-ya think?
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PostSubject: Re: I'm Writing A Book, Guys   Sun Nov 21, 2010 8:56 pm

I agree--though, in my defense, this would probably be halfway into the chapter, after when the scene would have been set. So yeah. >_>;

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PostSubject: Re: I'm Writing A Book, Guys   Mon Nov 22, 2010 4:10 am

Oh I see. Otherwise, sounds good. Try to include details of your characters are you progress through the prose and you should do well.
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